


the astronomy tower

by saraheli



Category: LOONA (Korea Band), YYXY
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Alternate Universe - Magic, Angst, F/F, Fluff, Ravenclaw Reader, Reader-Insert, Slytherin Yves, Slytherin/Ravenclaw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-15
Updated: 2018-06-15
Packaged: 2019-05-23 18:38:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14939705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saraheli/pseuds/saraheli
Summary: Once you were allowed in the astronomy tower, you never wanted to leave. It became your solace, and, as it happens, Sooyoung felt the same way.





	the astronomy tower

You’d been coming here to do your work since Professor Sinestra had given you a free pass to the astronomy tower in your third year. 

“You know, I’m not really supposed to let you up here when there’s no class...but Ravenclaws have reputation for keeping their noses out of trouble, and besides,” she’d leaned down to smile at you then, “I do think you’ll do a lot of good work up there.” 

Since that morning, you’d sealed the promise of a key with an agreement of secrecy with the astronomy professor and spent every evening you could on your own by the balcony. It helped immensely with your focus to be in the cool evening air, surrounded by the sounds of the living grounds beneath. Your friends always asked for your help on papers and other assignments—especially charms, your best subject—but you would only allow yourself to help them on Mondays and Wednesdays. The other days were for you and your studies, and that was that. 

You were usually alone, but sometimes, the odd professor or older students would find their way. You would either conceal yourself, or wait it out, but today, neither strategy was working. For the past few weeks, another girl in your year, Slytherin, could be found lurking along the stairwell and highest spire. Always alone, always humming to herself. 

You’d had a class or two with her inevitably, but you couldn’t place her name. You wouldn’t have to try for much longer. 

“You could ask me to go, you know,” she said to you over her shoulder, flashing a brilliant smile. “You’re supposed to be up here, I assume. And I’m not.” 

She turned to face you, and you knew your face must have turned pink from the way she smirked. You decided then that you couldn’t help it—she was just so beautiful. That smooth smile, tinted with innocence, and those dark eyes that glinted with mischief; they made your stomach tie itself in knots. How she could do that with a single look, you couldn’t calculate, but you noted that it must have something to do with the way the afternoon sun backed her silhouette. It must. 

“That’s none of my business,” you replied coolly. You didn’t even bother removing your quill from the parchment in your lap. You looked down at what you had been writing, trying not to curl into yourself when you heard her approach you.

She sat on the stair in front of you, her gaze visible just beyond the edge of your scroll. 

“As long as I don’t get in your way, huh?” 

You didn’t respond, and you tried to keep your visage unreadable and unaffected. This made the other girl chuckle, but she also, much to your relief, moved away from you again. 

“That’s fair, but, I should let you know that I’ve been watching you a little,” she laughed again when you raised your eyebrows. “Not like that. Just a little observation. I thought you might be able to help me with something.”

“If it’s classwork, I’m not interested.” 

“I’m sure,” she snorted. “But it’s not.” 

She paused, leaning back against the railing. You had to stop yourself from staring at her. She smiled a little to herself as she thought, undoubtedly considering whether or not she should reveal her desires to you, and that smile made you remember her name. 

Ha Sooyoung had been in your potions lessons since forever. From your first year through this very day, you’d never gone a moment in the potions classroom without Sooyoung at a table nearby. She always talked back to Professor Slughorn; he called it spunk, you called it rude. It could be debatably called either one, you assumed, but regardless, she was remarkably good at potions despite never seeming to try. Effortlessly brewing any recipe set before her was not luck, it was clear skill and genuine interest concealed by a lust to maintain her established image: loud, wild, and unattainable. 

It never made sense to you then, and it didn’t now, but what could you say? You didn’t know her. Not really. 

“What is it then?” You asked, eyes flicking up from your work to look at her, but she was turned away from you now. 

“Interested are we?” She looked down over the railing, “Kidding. But, I do need to get into the Ravenclaw dormitories. Personal business, you understand. I want to,” she shrugged, “leave a gift for someone.” 

“You’re not allowed in. Can’t you just, oh, I don’t know, give the gift to a Ravenclaw to leave?” 

Sooyoung turned to face you, “That would be majorly impersonal. But I get it. Rules are important to you. Think about it.”

You made a face, “Can’t you find someone else to help you since I clearly don’t want to?” 

Sooyoung shifted her weight from one leg to the other and shrugged, “Maybe I will, but I’d rather not. I’ve had my eye on you for some time, and I think it needs to be you.”

“Oh?”

You watched her expectantly, awaiting some kind of explanation because, generally, when someone confesses to having been  _ watching _ and  _ considering _ you (or, rather, anything as absurd as such), they go on to explain the rationale behind their behavior, but Sooyoung, as seems to be characteristic, liked to make things difficult apparently, and she left you wondering for the rest of the week that followed. 

Now, you were the type of person amused by puzzles. You loved figuring out the answer, especially if doing such had been a particularly laborious task, but the Sooyoung puzzle took over your mind in a way that was unusual even for you. You were distracted in class, and your friends took notice. They prodded you when you spaced and hissed whispers of concern in your ear when you mistook a note.

“What’s going on with you today?” Your friend asked as you walked from transfiguration to lunch. “It’s like you’re somewhere else entirely.”

“Don’t tell me it’s about that girl you met,” your other friend scoffed. 

You scrunched up your nose, “So what if it is? She said some pretty strange things if I do say so myself.” You felt your cheeks warm when your friends exchanged looks, “And I do, by the way!” 

“I’m sure you do,” they teased. You rolled your eyes and wrapped your fingers nervously around the strap of your shoulder bag. 

This was how they behaved every time you got too invested in something. That boy in your first year, Ministry conspiracy theories, the seemingly endless stream of gossipy stories you came across about previous students written in the margins of your textbooks: you were definitely someone who let your mind glue to things. But this was different. This time, it was actually about  _ you _ , and Sooyoung had made it that way. 

The next time you saw her was equally as cryptic, but you learned that she may be observing you more than you thought. 

“I think that kind of thing makes you a stalker,” you said bluntly, making a face of discomfort. 

Sooyoung shrugged, looking over your shoulder from where she had taken a seat beside you. “Maybe. I like to call it ‘doing my research’. I needed to know whether or not you were worth talking to.” She grinned at you. “Arithmancy?” 

“Huh?” You furrowed your eyebrows before looking down at your work again, “Oh. Yes, yes. We’ve got—”

“A quiz next Monday? I know,” she tilted her head emotionlessly to the side. “I’m in your section. I sit behind you.” 

You raised your eyebrows in surprise, “Oh. I didn’t—”

“Notice? I figured,” she leaned back onto her elbows. “I’m quiet in that class. Vector doesn’t piss me off much, so I never have much to say. Plus, I like mathematics, so I just do it.” She chuckled. “You’re not allowed to let on that I said that, okay?”

“Whatever,” you scoffed. You heard her swallow.

“So,” she started after a few moments. “Have you thought more about what I said last week?”

You shrugged. 

“That a yes or a no?”

“I’ve thought about it. That doesn’t mean I’ll do it.”

She didn’t bother you further then. She shrugged and leaned back on her palms and stared out over the lake that lapped in the distance. She made small talk with you, always curious how far along you were in your work or how you were feeling. You asked her those questions, too, and, though they’d stared as a courtesy of sorts, you (though you wouldn’t admit it) began to care about her answers. You began to hope she would smile as she told you about her week, began to see her features carved in the clouds during the days you didn’t see her. You began to wish she would say hello when you passed in the corridors, but she would never give you more than a knowing look, a barely-there reference of the secret that you two shared. 

There were many nights like this one, but they changed soon in the weeks before summer break was to come. 

“Remember when I first talked to you up here how I needed to get into the Ravenclaw tower?” Sooyoung asked from somewhere behind you. You hummed a little “yes”, not looking back. “Right, well, shockingly, I still need to get in, you know.”

“And I’m still not on board, Sooyoung.” 

Sooyoung smiled a little to herself at this, sucking in a breath of amusement. This set something alight in the pit of your stomach; you were more than frustrated with the fact that she, after barely acknowledging your existence and then forcing her way into your head, thought she knew that you would bend to her whimsy for some reason. She didn’t know you, and you certainly didn’t know her beyond what you had previously assumed, so the notion made you clear your throat in irritation. 

“What if I tell you why I’m doing it?” 

You hated yourself for it, but you perked up slightly at this. You had been curious, of course, but how could you just ask? You cleared your throat. 

“Go ahead.”

She told you it was for a girl. She’d messed things up with someone or believed she might—it wasn’t clear—and needed to get her attention. It needed to be a grand-rule-breaking gesture, she said, or else it wouldn’t be enough. 

“Risk is necessary to prove you care, after all,” Sooyoung said, furrowing her eyebrows seriously at a spot on the ground. 

She told you carefully that this was important, and that she picked you because you’d never be suspected. You’d never be someone that people watched; you were as good as a speck on the wallpaper. You made a face when she said that. Admittedly, you found it somewhat sweet that Sooyoung was so hard bent on doing something for this girl, and it was admirable how determined she was, but using you for that because no one noticed you? That rubbed you the wrong way.

“Jeez, I’m not invisible,” you murmured, curling your shoulders forward. 

“Oh, really? Then how come no one ever notices you coming up here? No one asks why. No one gives a—”

“No one says anything about  _ you _ either, Sooyoung.” You spat. You were fed up. “Thanks for watching me when no one else would, but no thanks.” 

She sat silently beside you for a moment, and, if you’d managed to make yourself look at her, you might have seen her visibly shrink like you had only moments before. She knew she’d overstepped, and she knew what you would say. 

“So, it’s a no.” You added, starting to roll up your scroll. “You’ll have to find someone else.” 

Sooyoung didn’t say anything to you as you carefully bound your paper and put your things into your bag. The sun was beginning to set, washing the sky with deep evening rose, and the heat in the air was dissipating into the cold darkness. 

“Seriously?” She sounded like your response caused her a major inconvenience. 

“Seriously.” 

You got to your feet and tossed your bag across your body. The wind blew, and you felt needles of rain prick your cheeks and force a blush across your features despite your sheer lack of embarrassment. 

“I’ll see you around, Sooyoung,” you said over your shoulder before leaving her alone atop the astronomy tower that night. 

She didn’t come back after that. Part of you was thankful to have your space back, and for the peace and quiet that she’d stolen from you for the past weeks, but you couldn’t deny that you were slightly disappointed. Though, admittedly, you had been the one to end things, whatever they had been, with her, part of you had assumed that (stubborn as she was) she would come back for more the next week. Maybe she’d finally gotten it through her head that you were not interested in her scheme. You weren’t interested in being used because you were a nobody, and, clearly, she wasn’t interested in making you feel like you were anything more than exactly that. 

Your friends tried their best to console you, but you made it difficult by sheerly refusing to admit that you were anything beyond irritated with Sooyoung. They wanted you to admit that you were hurt and that you were disappointed. 

“I know you were hoping that she’d picked you because you were special or because you were smart, or...or whatever, but she’s doing the only thing she—”

“It doesn’t matter, oh my goodness,” you scoffed, and you rather violently cut apart your egg with your fork. “She just wanted what she wanted, and-and it doesn’t matter! I’m fine. I’ll probably never speak to her again as long as I’m here.” You forced out a chuckle, but when you looked up, your friends eyed you with ample concern. “What?”

They mumbled to each other and shook their heads, making you huff. You needed to focus; you had exams this week. You didn’t have time for whatever Sooyoung made you feel. 

* * *

That evening after your arithmancy exam, you couldn’t be bothered to head to the astronomy tower. You really did need to diffuse your stress, give yourself some space, but you were so mentally exhausted that all you could think about was collapsing into your bed and letting yourself pass out for the evening. However, your plans were interrupted by a note stuck to the wall beside the Ravenclaw tower entryway adorning your name.

The eagle knocker squawked when you tugged the paper from the stone, “Best be careful, Miss. A Slytherin girl left that.”

You scrunched up your nose and slipped the parchment into your pocket, “Thanks, but I probably won’t be opening it.” 

The knocker, after answering that such was likely for the best, gave you a riddle, and, once you’d answered correctly, he allowed you up the stairs. The common room was a breath of fresh air after a long day, and you were thankful for the minimal noise. You dropped onto one of the sofas and cool light trickled onto you from the window behind you. You sighed, and, despite yourself, pulled the parchment from your pocket. 

You carefully opened it, and you were thankful to find that it made no noise and released no lights of any kind. 

_ I know you don’t want to hear from me. I understand that.  _

_ I wanted what I wanted, and I thought that you could help me to get that. I know that’s not an excuse.  _

_ I guess I thought I could use you. Let me make it up to you. _

_ If you want, meet me where I last saw you tonight. I’ll be there.  _

_ I’ll understand if you don’t come.  _

_ Sooyoung _

Your heart was beating hard in your chest, and you couldn’t understand why. You two weren’t close; it wasn’t as if you’d had some major falling out after ages of meaningful friendship. You knew barely anything about each other save what you’d seen from all of those silent nights you’d shared together in the astronomy tower and what you imagined might be true in your daydreams. You felt your fingers warm where they touched the letter, and you had to put it away. 

* * *

Sooyoung paced along the railing as she waited for you. She ran her hand along the metal, letting her skin collect the condensation. She swiped her hand quickly to cast the water off of the rail and down into the grounds. She wondered how fast it fell.

She could feel her pulse throbbing in her nervously throat as she considered that you really might not come. She knew, of course, and, as she tucked her silky hair behind her ear, she allowed herself to feel sad about it. She let herself miss you and feel guilty for hurting you. You were the only person she’d never had to pretend around before, and she messed it up all because she’d wanted to be forgiven by someone who didn’t know her deeply at all. Maybe she’d tell you for real about those people if she got the chance. 

Sooyoung started in surprise when she heard the gentle patter of footsteps coming up the tower. She softened when she saw it was you and marveled internally at the fact that you had come. 

“Hey,” she said meekly as she turned to face you. “Thanks for coming.”

You shrugged. It occurred to her that this was the first time she’d seen you in something other than your robes. You wore jeans and a tee shirt that hung beautifully from your frame. Your hair was messy from pushing your fingers through it, and your lower lip was swollen and glossed from being bitten nervously as you so often did. 

“Yeah, well, I couldn’t just leave you hanging.” You looked down at your feet, and her heart swelled at that.

“You could have,” her skin felt warm, and she took a calculated step closer to you. “I would have deserved that.” She paused, “I’m sorry I was so harsh before and for trying to make you do things for me without knowing me. That was...it was weird and uncool, and I’m sorry.” 

You met her eyes, and it felt like the first time you’d ever seen her. It felt like her essence ran from her eyes like streams of tears, like you could see the inside of her mind. You looked away. 

“I know you didn’t mean it that way. I’m sure you can find someone else to get you into the tower. There are plenty of Ravenclaws who—”

“No, I don’t need that. I need you to forgive me,” she said seriously, coming even closer. 

She’d never been so close to you before. She’d sat behind you in class and beside you on the floor, but she could smell the scent of your soap and the mint of your breath. She could feel the living heat glowing from you. She bit her lip. 

“It’s like I said, Sooyoung, it’s—”

“No, I need you to say that you forgive me. That matters. I owed you an apology, and if...if you’re going to give me anything, that’s all I want.” 

Her voice had lowered to a whisper, and she felt like the newly arrived nighttime was making her float. She felt like she should lean in closer and melt into you, and the thought made her stomach flutter. She could hear your breathing change, and she knew you could feel it, too. But she couldn’t move. She was afraid of making things worse, of reading you wrong. 

“I…” you looked away from her again, and Sooyoung swore that the stars were reflected in your gaze. The moon hugged your skin. You heard her sigh, and you looked at her again. She took in a shaky breath when your eyes landed briefly on her parted lips. 

And then she couldn’t take it anymore. She was so full of desperation for your approval and misery for missing you. She wanted you to know her more than anyone, and she wanted to know you. She needed to. She needed something real and human and alive, and she got it by taking your face in her hands and quickly leaning in to meet your lips. 

You made a sound of surprise, frozen under her touch. You were rigid and unable to respond no matter how much you wanted to. Her lips were soft and damp and gentle, and you missed them when she pulled away to look at you with eyes widened in fear. 

“I’m so sorry,” her cheeks were red as her hands began to shakily pull away from your cheeks. “Fuck, I’m so—”

You shook your head in panic, leaning close to recapture her lips. You set your hands over hers to force them back onto your face. For a few moments, your lips moved in slow sync, and your fingers laced carefully through hers as they cupped your cheeks. You pulled away after that, breathless, your forehead pressed against hers. 

“It’s okay. I forgive you.” 


End file.
